Crikey I didn’t realise that I had been away so long.
To be honest over the last few months, I have been lucky that I’ve been able to string the right letters together to form my name, never mind creating a whole post. Now the latest member of our team is finally settling down, I can now sleep, eat and actually get myself off the settee so I think an update is required.
I’m around four months pregnant now and there was days when I didn’t think I was going to survive this long. My pregnancy with Est was a breeze compared to how this made me feel. The exhaustion was crippling and this alone was enough to take someone down but this coupled with all day nausea, and a wild three year old, nearly finished me off!
Sadly my uber healthy lifestyle got kicked to the curb early doors. I used to be into clean eating and then I was just into sausage sandwiches. It was the only thing that could get me through the morning. I even took to snaffling them in secret so that my work colleagues wouldn’t suspect anything before the magic 12 weeks. Only the week before I had been preaching on the 95 villianist ways of gluten, and here is was eating butties daily, under my desk, what a hypocrite … but the baby made me do it!!
I’m currently sporting a bump small enough to make people feel uncomfortable enough about asking whether I am or not for fear or causing offense … and I’m quite enjoying it to be honest. I think this is the difference between your first and second pregnancy. The first time around you are dying for people to ask, desperate for your belly to expand and disillusionally think that you are the centre of everyone’s universe. The second time around you are just like ‘get the hell outta my way, I’m too god damn busy for this shit!’.
In the first few weeks I felt pretty miserable but couldn’t tell anyone because it was all still top secret so I took to writing fake tweets in the notes on my phone. Here are some of the best …
“I had a dream about Christmas lunch last night. People were siting eating it in front on the telly and asking for mayonnaise. I woke up livid”
“The force is not with me today. I would give a double donation not to have to go the Macmillian coffee morning in an hour” (I stuck a £20 note in the pot, made an excuse and made a quick retreat!)
“A crumpet a day keeps the sickness away”
“Lentils and quinoa do nothing to rid sickness. They just take up room dedicated to the fight against nausea! Long live the sausage sandwich!!”
“I actually want to ring my own neck”
Finally, I’ve got over myself, the drama has died down and I no longer feel like I am going to die from pregnancy.